Tuesday, May 31, 2011

HELLO???

Hello...ello...ello

Is anybody there...ere...ere

Hello...ello...ello

Im alive...ive...ive

Everyone come back...ack...ack

Im here...ere...ere


{ Kara's BRAIN thinking:  Do they all think i have abandon them :(  }

Hellerr...err...err


OK!  I AM here!!!  I PROMISE!  So, most of you know the health, car wreck, stress issues I have had goin on the last 2 1/2 MONTHS!!!  SERIOUSLY...WHEN IT RAINS IT POURS!!!

I am SO SORRY I have been MIA...but I NEEDED to set all things aside for a bit, and GET WELL!  I have felt SO BAD just leaving you all "Hanging", but I HAD to take a lil break from everything and concentrate on getting well, DEstress, TAKE A BREATH and clear my head...Im SO SORRY I have been gone for { what feels like } FOREVA'!!!

Well...I think i am "Good to GO"!

And can I just say:

IF I DO NOT SEE ANOTHER DOCTOR FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE, THAT WOULD MAKE ME BEYOND HAPPY!  SICK OF DOCTORS OFFICES!!! HAD ENOUGH OF THEM LATELY!!!
NO SUCH LUCK!

I have a Drs appointment this morning...HOWEVER...Its just my Annual check up...WHICH... by the way, I HATE!   Because, it involves NEEDLES in my vein, SUCKING OUT MY BLOOD...Uuugg...I HATE NEEDLES!  I HATE NEEDLES!  I HATE NEEDLES!  Im a FAINTER!!!
It ALSO involves him CRANKING me OPEN { In my feminine AREA }  with some sort of metal CAR JACK or the "JAWS" of Life { in such a FRAGILE, PRIVATE area }...Like REALLY?  WHO designed that dang MEDICAL DEVICE anyway???  Had to be a MAN, cuz a woman would have designed it to be made of some sort of  SOFT, Teflon-ish, microwave safe, { so as to be able to be WARMED up a tad } to BLEND with our NATURAL body temperature!  NOT a  FREEZING piece of metal with "Razor" like edges, CRAMMED so far up it feels like its gonna come out our MOUTH!!!  Wwwaaa!!
THEN!  Lets not forget the FABULOUS experience of the EVER so POPULAR, MAMOGRAM!!!
Yeah!  I think that was designed by the same DUDE!  Seriously...let me PLOP your "Bubbies" WAY UP HERE { that stupid machine is up so high, I am LITERALLY on my TIPPIEST of toes...hhmmm, maybe today I will take some Stelettos } and SMASH IT in between the two METAL plates till we just are at the point we think they might EXPLODE!  Uuuuuyyeah!  THATS a BLAST!  Like, why dont you just take me out to the parking lot and RUN OVER my Bubbies with the car tires!  I would LUUUUUVVV to see that man { Mister METAL DEVICE creator }, lets see him PLOP his lil privates up on that "Car Crusher" and SHHMOOOSH his "Fragiles"...Thats actually EXACTLY what I think that machine is, now that I think about it...I think they have gone to the caryard, where they CRUNCH CARS, and just moved one right in the Drs office!  YEP!  That is the LOVELY morning I have in store for me!  ARE YA JEALOUS?!?!
I DO NOT WANT TO GO!  I think I PREFER the Ears, Nose and Throat Doctor...Actually...I DO!

SO!  I have to get ready to go ENJOY { HA! } my morning with my Car Jack CRANKIN, NEEDLE STABBING, Bubbie CRUNCHING Doctor...

HELP!!!  elp...elp...

I will see yall tomorrow for WHASSUP!

xoxokara

22 comments:

⚜ ↁℯℬℬᴵℰ⚜ said...

Glad to see you back. I hate that dang annual too. But I must say I would rather that than the dentist. Good luck!

Kim @ Savvy Southern Style said...

You are C R A Z Y!! So glad you are back. You are right a man had to have invented those devices! I was wondering about you just yesterday. Glad you are better.

At The Picket Fence said...

Hey my friend!!! So great to see a new post pop up from you! You should ALWAYS know that you just do what you need to do to take care of yourself, and we as your friends will ALWAYS support and encourage you in that. We don't come here for the parties (even though it is fun!) or for your incredible decorating skillzz(even though you are awesomely talented). We come here because we connect with you and your warm heart and spirit and because you are so very real! You have been through a lot (and still have such a riot of a day ahead of you today) and we know that it hasn't been easy. So, that said, welcome back friend! :-)
Love,
Vanessa

Becca said...

THERE you are !! Great to hear from you ... we've missed you and your funny, beautiful self !! Hope you're on the mend now, friend. And, that your appointments go well today ... I just did the same thing last week, so I feel your pain ... literally !! Looking forward to Whassup Whassup. Big hugs, xoxo, Becca

Karena said...

Kara dear I knew you would return to us!! Take care!

A New very Exciting $250 Giveaway from Tracy Porter

xoxo
Karena
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Ceekay- Thinkin of Home said...

Oh girlfriend...I have got you so beat on the doctor visits. I HATE them. And I say if God intended for us to give up our blood, he would have gave us a spikot. Anyways, glad you are feeling better!

Allyson Pecilunas said...

I am so glad that you are back! I so enjoyed your post that was cracking me up! You are HILARIOUS!! :)

Rosemary@villabarnes said...

Hysterical! So glad you're better. By the way, I will be enjoying that same experience next week. Thanks for reminding me how much fun it is! (LOL)

Vivienne @ the V Spot said...

YAY! Glad you're better.
BOO! You reminded me I need to make an appointment for my annual "violation" and boob mashing.

See you tomorrow.

Liz said...

Aww, so glad to hear your ok. I've had you on my mind lately and was just about to email you when I saw your post. You've been very missed.

I hope your appt. goes well. I just had my lovely appt. last week...glad it's over. You'll feel the same way after all is said and done. Hang in there. So happy your back. Love ya, Liz

The Polka Dot Closet said...

Glad your back, we are all here and have not gone any where, glad you are on the road to recovery

Carol

NanaDiana said...

Glad to see you, Texas!!! Hope you had a ball at the Dr's office today. Do you get smart mouthed with him or just let it all out here? I'm betting you don't get smart mouthed there cuz he could do some serious damage- YEOUCH!

You ARE sounding more like your old self though and that is a good thing! Glad you are back- Hugs- Diana

Handy Man, Crafty Woman said...

That is too funny... I am dreading the first time I have to do the "booby" squish...that'll be coming up soon, aaack.

Faye said...

You are too funny, you sure have a good sense of humor...I bet you are a blast to hang out with. I was afraid you had severe weather last week, glad it was not that. It was smart to take a break from everything for awhile.
Take care...
Faye
(wildrosevintage)

Curtains In My Tree said...

I am glad that is all over for you the being sick and stressed out.

Guess we all go through that sometime in our lives.

I missed you and as I would look at your blog throught about how you were

I just had the yearly dig in your stuff thing and my lady doctor had a new clear plastic jack LOLOLOLOL

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